"Look at this tree again." The female doctor pointed to the tree drawn by Xier and analyzed to Zhang Tan and Tan Jiner, "The branches are thick, dense, and there are many branches. There are still a few bird nests on the tree. But you see, the trunk is hollow! The leaves, branches and bird nests can be regarded as she wants to provide shelter for others, but her own abilities are seriously insufficient. In other words, Xier is very caring and a warm child, but her kindness often exceeds her ability, which will hurt her own..."
Zhang Tan and Tan Jiner listened very seriously, and Tan Jiner looked nervous.
The female doctor continued: "Let's talk about people, Xi'er paints stickman, but they are a little different from ordinary stickman. Their heads are big and their proportions are seriously out of order. A big head can be understood as a feeling of inferiority deep in her heart. She needs to make up for her insignificant body through her exaggerated head..."
A small and powerless body? Tan Jin'er silently recited, how could Xier have this kind of mentality?
She looked at Xier, who was watching TV not far away, and saw that the three children were very serious and staring. Xier always had a smile on her face, looking very sunny.
The female doctor seemed to feel her emotions and said, "I just talked about some bad aspects. Now I talk about the good side. In fact, there are many good aspects. Why don't you see, there are a big sun in this painting, which is bright and clear, which means that Xier is very sunny and does not have psychological diseases. This family environment is really important. Many children who have physical neglect problems are generally in a low mood, and there are many depression and introverts..."
Tan Jin'er said: "I would talk to my sister every night, and she would tell me everything."
After saying this, she suddenly thought that Xier didn't tell her everything, such as the psychological problems she observed today and her inner anxiety.
The female doctor explained: "In fact, it is not necessarily that Xier didn't tell you about this. She may not have deliberately concealed it, but she didn't know it herself and she didn't notice it. She was still too young."
These words made Tan Jiner feel a little more uncomfortable.
"What should I do next?" Tan Jin'er asked.
"To eliminate the inferiority and guilt deep in her heart and make her face face to herself, the focus should be on two aspects: one is relationship reconstruction and the other is body reconstruction."
This professional term made Zhang Tan and Tan Jiner confused.
The female doctor continued: "The so-called relationship reconstruction is to invite your sister to participate in Xier's treatment. You can help Xier eliminate her inner inferiority and guilt through sincere exchanges. For example, you must admit that stress comes from life, not Xier. You must let Xier exchange sincerely, not one step, but you need to slowly get closer to her heart and take the initiative to launch relevant topics. Don't worry, I will teach you how to operate it. More importantly, you must establish a common life goal, such as you must work hard to buy a house as your home, and decorate the home together to warmly and comfortably. Remember, you must work together to achieve this goal. To make Xier feel involved, she must participate in it wholeheartedly. Her opinions must be adopted and her voice should be valued."
Tan Jin'er couldn't help but remember that she had just moved into her new home not long ago, and the decoration was basically nothing for them. As for the decoration of the house, except Xier's own small room, she had done everything else by herself, and she had never asked Xier for her opinion.
She still remembers that day Xier chased her and said, would it be good to raise a bouquet of flowers here, would it be good to place more dolls there, could you post photos with Xiaobai on the refrigerator, etc.
Some of her adopted them, some did not, and she did not explain to Xier if she did not adopt them.
Maybe the little sister was very disappointed, but she just didn't say anything.
Thinking of this, Tan Jiner couldn't help but feel ashamed that she had so many shortcomings in her life.
Seeing that she pondered, Zhang Tan asked, "What does body reconstruction mean?"
The female doctor said: "It is to let Xier re-establish care for food and her body. For example, it can introduce a 'nurturing diary' to record the taste of a food every day, with the key marking it as 'This is my sister's love for me'. For example, the warmth of rice is equal to the temperature of my sister's palm. Create more diaries to make the food feel equivalent to my sister's love. In this way, Xier will gradually re-establish love for food. In addition, it can design 'sister recipes', and the two of them cook dishes that symbolize "connection", such as traditional food in their hometown, and take Xier to cook together and cook delicious food together."
Zhang Tan immediately thought of Tuanzi in his mind.
Xier’s favorite dumpling.
"Duanzi?" Tan Jin'er couldn't help but speak, and she thought of Tuanzi at the first time.
The female doctor smiled and said, "Of course the dumplings are OK, it is best to be food with special significance."
Tan Jiner nodded and explained clearly.
The female doctor said: "I'll give you a manual, you can refer to it. If you don't understand, you can ask me any time you don't understand. Although the operating manual is recorded in detail, the actual operation process varies from person to person and environment to person. Every child is unique, and the situation they encounter is unique. There is no universal rule. The key is to touch the child's inner world."
"Touch the child's inner world?" Tan Jiner thought.
"Yes, you thought you had entered her world, but it wasn't necessarily true. You have to feel it carefully."
“…Okay, I will do it.”
Tan Jiner's tone was very firm.
At this time, the female doctor suddenly looked at Zhang Tan, and said with a serious expression: "I finished talking about Xier, let's talk about Xiaobai now."
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Zhang Tan was stunned: "Ah? Xiaobai?"
He didn't react for a moment, no, wasn't this for Xier to show? Why did he suddenly talk about Xiaobai? Does Xiaobai have psychological problems?
The female doctor nodded: "Yes, I think it is necessary to tell you clearly. There are some problems with Xiaobai's painting just now. Do you want to listen to it?"
Zhang Tan remembered the "Houseman" painted by Xiaobai just now. Apart from being more abstract, he didn't think there was anything special.
"Is there anything wrong with that painting?" he asked.
The female doctor took Xiaobai's painting out of the folder and spread it on the coffee table and said, "I have never had an in-depth understanding of Xiaobai. I don't look like Xier, so it's hard to infer. I just talk about this painting. Please understand if there is something wrong."
She did a lot of homework for Xier. She talked with Tan Jiner for a long time the day before, so today she was able to interpret a lot of things from Xier's paintings.
However, she had never had a detailed understanding of Xiaobai. Only by interpreting it through paintings, it was inevitable that there would be excessive interpretation or inadequate interpretation.
This needs to be explained in advance.
Zhang Tan expressed his understanding: "You just say that."
Chapter completed!