The moment I saw the news, I thought I would faint.

But I don't.

While enduring all the feelings this news brings, I thought I would cry.

But neither do I.

I didn't even have a tear flowing, but my eyes were so dry that I would hurt after blinking, so I almost didn't blink anymore. I just opened my eyes so blankly, looking at the fine silver-gray rain curtain outside the door, covering up some of the eyes.

The sky is gradually turning.

I don’t know when the rain stopped, but it was dark.

The sunlight faded away bit by bit, like a huge black hand, slowly pinching me tightly, and everything around me was slowly swallowed by darkness. The whole room was as quiet as a silent tomb.

In such a dead darkness, I slowly lit a candle.

The fire lit up and pierced my eyes and a sharp pain suddenly came to my eyes. Tears surged up, blurring everything in my sight.

But I still stubbornly opened my eyes wide and looked at the swaying fire.

However, in the blur of tears, the faint candlelight became a sea of ​​fire.

The familiar sea of ​​fire...

I was reborn from that sea of ​​fire, but why did the figure in the sea of ​​fire, the figure who gave me a chance to be reborn, become so blurry...

.

It's dawn.

The candlelight struggled all night and finally could not hold on at this moment. The candle heart thrust into a wisp of blue smoke and finally went out.

I just kept guarding this candlelight for a night.

When I raised my eyes, a faint light shone through the door that was hidden, shining on my face.

I thought I would not be able to pass this night.

A faint curve appeared on the corner of my mouth.

Speaking of which, this world will not be unable to continue just because of leaving anyone. Even when I lost my first child, I was so painful that I did not give up my life in the end?

In fact, whose life is not like this?

How can there be absolute happiness and certain eternity?

As a human being, how many opportunities and how lucky we are to meet the person who I love him and who will love me. Even if we meet, how much chance will the two of us be able to keep going? Perhaps any small thing in life will separate the two people, destroy this love, and even tear it apart.

And God made me meet him, and made him love me, and even did things he did not dare to think about in the past for me.

This is the greatest kindness that God has given me for the miserable and displaced for the past half of my life.

Thinking of this, I slowly stood up, but because I sat all night, my legs were almost swollen and unconscious, and I almost fell down again. I hurriedly held the table and barely stabilized my body. When my legs and feet recovered, I pushed the door and walked out slowly.

The morning air is slightly cool and sweet.

It's not far away, the smell of bamboo forest.

I looked up at the distance and looked at the green green in the inner courtyard. The morning breeze was filled with the fragrance of bamboo leaves. I took a deep breath and felt that it was cool to my heart. It seemed that all the sorrow, sorrow, and unbearable that all the night and half of my life had been washed away.

In a trance, I remembered another morning. He stood in front of me wearing a long gown, holding a bowl, and half of the water in his hand, and meeting him as if he had met again in another world. His pupils were clear and his smile was cold and thin. The air was filled with the fragrance of bamboo leaves and the fragrance of soil.

My tears fell and fell into his palm. The half-sink clear water caused layers of ripples.

This is the result of my unforgettable joy in this life.

I don't blame him.

I don't hate anyone.

I just felt sorry for it, it turned out that it was a silly joy.

.

I don’t know how long it took, but a few maids came to meet him and said carefully: “Madam Qingying.”

"Madam, what's wrong with you? Your face looks so ugly!"

The faint phantom in front of me was like morning mist, dissipated by the wind. I stood there in a daze for a long time, leaving only the empty space in front of me, and then I came to my senses a little.

Turning his head, he met the concerned and cautious gazes of the maids.

I smiled faintly: "Where is the young master?"

"The young master is in the inner courtyard. Last night, Miss Li kept shouting to come to find her wife, so the young master stayed in the inner courtyard to accompany Miss Li."

"Oh." I nodded and said to them: "Please get some hot water. I want to wash it first and then go to the inner courtyard to find the young master."

"yes."

They had prepared for a long time. After I finished speaking, the copper basin and towel containing hot water came. After washing it for a while, I looked at the mirror and although I was still haggard and the red blood in my eyes could not be washed away, it looked a little bit, so I changed my clothes and walked towards the inner courtyard.

After the spring rain, it is often a better sunny day, especially the spring rain in the south of the Yangtze River, which adds a touching vitality to the land. The flowers, plants and trees in the courtyard have sprouts. The more prosperous it is, the more crystal rain and dew are falling on the eaves, cleaning the bluestone slabs under your feet, and you can feel a fresh breath no matter where you go.

It seems that everything is completely refreshed.

I walked slowly in such a vibrant yard, but when I walked to the arch bridge, I looked up and saw a familiar slender figure standing at the bridgehead, looking at me.

It's Han Ruoshi.

I didn't expect to see her first, but she was clearly waiting for me in this way - if she was waiting for Pei Yuanxiu, she should naturally look in the direction of the inner courtyard.

After thinking about it, I walked over calmly: "Miss Ruoshi."

"Sister Qingying." When she saw me, she immediately smiled and held my hand: "Are you okay? I was worried that you were sick when I saw you like that yesterday. Are you okay now?"

Her hands were colder, colder than mine, and she looked like she was asked. I shook my head gently and said, "I'm fine, I lost my composure yesterday."

"Sister, don't say that."

She held my hands tightly, as if she wanted to warm me up, but I felt cold in her palm.

However, when she spoke, her words were very enthusiastic: "Sister, you have to know that your every move is holding the young master's heart. When you were uncomfortable yesterday, the young master ignored everything. He did not send any gifts to Xichuan. He didn't even read any of the booklets sent from the mansion. He is still piled in his study."

“…is it?”

"Even if he wants to build a soldier, he doesn't care."

“…”

Han Ruoshi held my hand and said softly: "Sister, you stay by your side. Your son is meticulous to you. If you really fall ill, you may not be able to bear it. In this way, my sister doesn't know what to do."

I raised my head, looked at her worried look, and for a while, I said lightly: "No."

"No? Does my sister think that even if you are sick, the young master will not care?"

"..." I shook my head gently: "I'm not talking about this."

“…”

She blinked her starry eyes, which were clearly black and white, and looked at me in confusion. I had already pulled my hand back and said, "Thank you for your concern, but don't worry, the young master will not be able to stand it."

"That's good."

"Now, I'm going to go to the inner courtyard to see Li'er. Is Miss Ruoshi going with me?"

"Uh, I won't go."

As she said, her smile a little embarrassing. Thinking back to the way Pei Yuanxiu stopped her in the inner courtyard, I regretted my words, but at this time I didn't care much, nodded apologetically to her, and turned around and crossed the bridge.

As soon as I walked to the bamboo forest path in the inner courtyard, I heard Li'er's voice coming from inside: "When will you come?"

My steps stopped and I heard a quiet inside for a moment, and then Pei Yuanxiu's voice sounded: "It'll be here soon."

"Dad, you said so last night."

“…”

I sighed as I listened.

It seems that Pei Yuanxiu is a person who is being tortured by this girl.

Thinking of this, I speeded up and walked over. After a turn, I saw that in the elegant temple, after a day of drizzle, it became more and more refreshing and warm. There were rain and dew falling on the eaves. Pei Yuanxiu was wearing a white dress and stood on the porch, looking up at the clear rain and dew, while Li'er was standing beside him, holding his belt with one hand.

Both of them saw me at the same time, and Li'er immediately smiled happily and rushed over: "Mom!"

I walked over and hugged the girl who was hitting her head-on. I felt the warmth coming from her little body, which seemed to drive away the numbness of my limbs and bodies. She wrapped her hands around my neck and kept rubbing my cheeks: "Mom, why didn't you come back last night? Li'er is so worried about you."

"Don't worry, isn't you back?"

Speaking of this, I looked up at Pei Yuanxiu.

He still stood there motionless, his eyes still had a gentle expression, but he could see that it was covered with blood.

This night was also a sleepless night for him.

I felt a little guilty, and walked up the steps with Li'er in my arms and said softly: "Young Master."

"You're back."

"Well. Thank you, my master, for helping me see Gu Li'er."

"Why do you need to thank me?"

“…”

I looked at the gentle eyes and said nothing, but turned to Li'er in my arms and said, "Li'er, I'm so hungry."

Li'er immediately said, "Didn't you have breakfast?"

"Well, I'm rushing back to see Li'er, I haven't eaten yet."

"Then Li'er will help her get it!"

"Okay. Go and tell the kitchen people that my mother wants to have snacks, and she needs almond crisps, chestnut cakes, jam cakes, and a dish of crystal bags and shredded chicken porridge."

"Mom wants to eat so much?"

"Then do you remember?"

"sure!"

She shouted proudly, I put her down, and the girl turned around and ran out, while running silently, as if she was afraid that she would forget it.

Looking at her cute appearance, I just felt that no matter how much pain was, it seemed nothing.

When her back was running out of sight, I slowly turned around. Pei Yuanxiu's face was not smiling at all, but it was too calm and there was no glory in his eyes. He looked at me quietly.

I thought about it, took a deep breath, and finally said, "No matter what, the young master has raised Li'er for so many years, allowing her to grow up carefree and happily. Qingying cannot repay such a great kindness. With a thank you, it should be said."

"..." He looked at me and didn't say anything.

Although I didn't say anything, I also understood everything from those eyes. Just as when I got the news yesterday, he immediately understood it and knew what I would do.

Thinking of this, I apologized, but also confessed: "I have something to say to the young master."

“…”

After a long silence, he finally spoke, but his voice was hoarse. Although a smile appeared on his face, the smile seemed to disappear in the next moment.

"Do you have to say it now?"

I looked into his eyes and said softly: "Actually, when I was on the boat, I should say it."

“…”

"But the young master advised me not to rush to say, you said, maybe time will change what I want to say."

"Didn't time change you?"

“…”

I was silent for a moment and shook my head gently.

At this moment, his eyes flashed, as if something had broken in an instant, falling to the ground.

That kind of brokenness made me feel pain, but no matter how it hurts, it should be short-term.
Chapter completed!