Chen Ruzhan did not comfort her because she knew this feeling best. No matter what kind of comfort she said, no matter what kind of environment a person recovered from, he relied on himself most of the time.

After so many years, if she had to rely on others to get out, she would have been no longer alive.

Most kind-hearted consolation is also to uncover the scars again and again, especially when others do not mention it actively, but you think that taking the initiative to comfort yourself will make you look kind.

She had thought about dying countless times, but she knew that people must have reasons to live. If she had no more, then think about the people she cared about.

So she came because Xie Xiu was the one she cared about.

Xie Cunhao and General Xie care about every brother of his.

That time, Chen Ruzhan rescued not only Xie Xiu, but also seven of them rescued. These seven people are now alive, but most of them chose not to meet again for the rest of their lives.

Except for Chen Ruzhan, because she was their general's wife and their sister. The general was only in his twenties that year, but a man in his forties would also call her "sister".

So Chen Ruzhan takes time to walk every year, at least to meet one of them, tell them that she is okay, and hope they are all well.

General Xie is gone, but Mrs. Xie is still there.

Because she is still here, these surviving people may have sustenance, and there will be someone to take care of, and they will also think about taking care of others.

For example...Lu Qingluan.

He was also the one who survived at that time. He chose to leave because he could not face the past or face the Chen Ruzhan. Later, he returned because he could not put aside the responsibility in his heart.

Lu Qingluan, who has experienced hiding and facing it again, understands better than others what those who survived need to do.

"Sister, don't leave."

When Xie Xiu stopped crying, the tea that was as deep as a cup of tea was already cold.

He looked at Chen Ruzhan and said, "I have sent someone to look for you for a long time and my brothers for a long time. I have found them except you and Brother Qingluan, but they are unwilling to come. If you can stay, I will send someone to invite them again, and they will definitely be willing to come."

His tone was filled with loss and powerlessness.

"If they knew you would come here no matter how far they would be, then they would be better off. I have the ability to take care of them now, I..."

When he said this, he looked at Chen Ruzhan, and he could no longer say anything later.

Because he saw the answer he gave to him in Shen Ruzhan's eyes.

She will not stay.

After a while, Chen Ruzhan slowly breathed: "You don't have to think so much. I should also say thank you to all the brothers who died. Without you, their families would not have received the pensions from the court."

Xie Xiu shook his head: "The court did not issue any news."

Chen Ruzhan was stunned, but he quickly understood the meaning of Xie Xiu's words.

Xie Xiu lowered his head and said, "After I came back, the first thing I did was to ask my family if the person I arranged to come back, whether the list and my blood book were brought back. Actually, I probably guessed what the answer would be before I went home, but I didn't give up."

After he came back, he asked, his family had not received his blood letter, and the entourage had never returned.

Half a year later, the people from the Xie family found the follower in Yuzhou and brought it to Xie Xiu.

Xie Xiu asked him why, and he said he was afraid.

The follower thought that if he came back and brought back the young master's blood letter and directory, the people from the Xie family would not let him go.

The young master died and he was back. What is the use of keeping such a entourage?

He knew what his fate would be, so he chose to escape. With all the money that Xie Xiu gave him during the separation, he ran to Yuzhou to hide his identity.

Xie Xiu said in a low voice: "I killed him. Although I know that it is not really wrong for him to think so, he shouldn't have burned the roster."

Xie Xiu raised his hand and pinched his temple. With such force, his nails had already pinched blood marks on his temples.

There are many such traces in his temple location, which shows that this is not the first time he has done this.

He pinched so hard that it was hatred for the entourage burning the roster, and for himself.

"I didn't remember so many names at that time, I really wanted to remember..."

The sound is trembling.

Chen Ruzhan stood up and pulled his hand away. At that moment, she truly felt Xie Xiu's pain, that endless pain.

Xie Xiu went to Xifengguan for a year. During the eleven months, he disliked each other with the soldiers of the border. How could he be curious about everyone's name?

At that time, he was full of disgust and even disgusted with the local buns around him.

In the last less than a month, the brothers accepted him, but he could remember the names of each of his men and the names of the soldiers around the general, but he could not remember the others. In fact, he had never known it.

Everyone has received pensions at home, two years later.

Even so, he was still in pain because although he remembered those names now, he did not match the faces in his mind.

He couldn't find the list, so he had to ask someone to go to the Ministry of War of Da Chu to investigate, but found that the Ministry of War of Da Chu did not have the directory files of all the soldiers in that small town. Not to mention the soldiers, he didn't even have the general's name.

Because the general betrayed the Xie family, this was actually an arrangement from the Xie family. The Xie family deliberately asked the Ministry of War not to distribute supplies to the border troops in that small town and distribute military expenses, and wanted to force the general to come home.

However......

This is also one of the reasons why Xie Xiu was so painful. When he tried his best to find the names of those people, he realized that his family played such an ugly role in it.

Later, he sent people to Liangzhou to see General Dan Taiqi, and obtained a complete list in the Liangzhou army.

In fact, Xie Xiu didn't have much hope at that time, because he knew that General Tan Tai had no reason to have such a roster because it was not a direct affiliation.

But what he didn't expect was that General Dan Tai asked the people he sent to reply to him, telling him that the names of every border pass and every border soldier in the Western Xinjiang could be found in Liangzhou.

During that battle, the Great Chu army in the pass did not come to support it because they had weak troops and felt that they would die if they went there.

It was the Liangzhou Army, eight hundred miles away, who arrived in a starry night under the leadership of General Dan Taiqi.

He killed the people of the Western Regions and avenged the brothers who died in Xifeng Pass.

After getting the roster, Xie Xiu immediately arranged for people to send pensions to the homes of all the fallen brothers, and he gave them ten times the pensions. He paid all of these money himself and then gave them every year.

But he felt that he could not make up for the debt.

Because the people of the Xie family erased those names from the list of the Ministry of War, they didn't know until their death. In fact, they were not considered soldiers of the Great Chu.

Every time he thinks about it, he feels extremely painful, and the only way is to torture himself.

The pinching marks on Xie Xiu's temples were tortures that he tried to match his name and face again and again but failed to succeed.

Because he was the last one to survive, he participated in almost every fallen brother's aftermath. He remembered every face, but what about the name?

Is a name important?

important!

Without a name, how do people in later generations remember that they were heroes and how do they remember their past of fighting to protect the Central Plains?

You go and tell others that I remember everyone's face, what a pale and powerless word.

Chen Ruzhan patted Xie Xiu's shoulder lightly and returned to his seat and sat back.

She has all the pain in Xie Xiu’s heart that Xie Xiu has experienced.

"Sister, when are you... leaving?"

Xie Xiu asked.

"tomorrow."

Chen Ruzhan said, "I'm going to rush back."

Xie Xiu asked again: "Is the business okay? If you need help from the Xie family..."

But he couldn't say what happened later. His relationship with his family over the years has not been very harmonious.

He chose to fight Yang Xuanji to die before surrendering, which was his maximum resistance to the family order.

Others think that he led his troops to fight Yang Xuanji's destiny army to prove his ability to Yang Xuanji.

But in fact, does he need to do this? Does the Xie family need to do this?

He just didn't want to be manipulated by his family, but he couldn't break free from the shackles tied to him.

Chen Ruzhan said in a calm tone: "Everything in the business world is easy to handle. After all, I have been doing business for so many years and have all sorted it out."

Xie Xiu still lowered his head: "That's good...that's good."

Chen Ruzhan took something from his cuff and put it on the table, then stood up: "I'll go back to the inn first. If you have anything to explain, you can send someone to the inn to inform you that I won't leave tomorrow morning."

Xie Xiu turned his head and looked at the thing she placed on the table. He was stunned for a moment, and then his eyes suddenly widened.

After a moment, he grabbed the thing suddenly, held it with both hands, and his hands were trembling violently.

It was an army card, the military card of the Xifeng Pass border army.

There is no name on such a military card, only the number of which army is engraved.

There are only five characters on the brand, Xifeng Pass in Xijiang.

It is impossible to determine which brother this military card belonged to, but for Xie Xiu, this is the most precious thing in the world, and his own military card is no longer possible.

After being captured, the military cards of several of them were thrown away by the Western Regions people and they were still trampled hard under the feet of the Western Regions people.

"sister......"

Xie Xiu stood up, held military cards in both hands, and bowed deeply to Chen Rukong.
To be continued...