"Is it Xiao Yue..." Grandma suddenly seemed to be energetic, her eyes opened a little wider, and there was energy inside.

"It's me, mother-in-law, I'm here." Lei Yue squeezed his grandmother's old hand, "I'm right here."

"Xiao Yue, you have to live a good life..." Grandma spoke very slowly, very messily, very weakly, and some of her voice was speechless, but her thin face still smiled so kindly, "Be happy every day...

…”

Lei Yue nodded repeatedly, as if he was standing at the art test performance site again. His face quickly turned into a bright smile, and his voice was full of expectation and joy, as if something great had just happened:

"Grandma, I just went to the Guomao International Trade Center to attend a class reunion, and I had a lot of fun with everyone. Yang Yinuo, remember her, she accepted the gift I gave her and promised to go to the movies with me. I think...

I think she really likes me."

Grandma must have heard it, and she grinned a better-looking smile on her old face that had already shown a lifeless look, and murmured something that she couldn't speak clearly.

Those loving eyes looked at him, and the newly restored look gradually disappeared, gradually dissipated, and finally returned to darkness.

The electrocardiogram monitor next to the hospital bed made a beeping sound, and the lines on the screen became straight. Grandma passed away, but there was still a smile from her last moments on her lips.

"Ha...haha..." Lei Yue's smile gradually became stiff, his throat trembled, and his eyes turned red.

He still held his grandmother's hand tightly and buried his head in the hospital bed, hiding his face and tears.

…

The night sky was so dark that it looked like it was about to collapse, and heavy rain was pouring down, washing away the neon-lit city.

Blue, purple, red and other dazzling lights are mixed with the rain, intertwined with the ghostly whistling of cars, everything is colorful and chaotic.

But in the eyes of those who return home alone, this is just a black and white world, like the screen of an old-fashioned television.

The old urban village, the quiet small apartment unit, and the once bright family photo on the coffee table in the living room have now become black and white.

Lei Yue did not turn on the light, and walked into his room in the dim light reflected from the window. The small room had not been tidied for many days, and everything was in a mess.

This home will also be gone.

His first home was burned to ruins by fire, and nothing was left except for him, who was rescued by his grandmother.

The place was demolished a few years later, and his grandmother and he received a sum of money, which they spent all on seeking treatment for his rotten face and strange illnesses over the years.

Lei Yue sat on the edge of the bed, looked at the medicine bottles on the bedside table, and stared at one of them, "Olanzapine."

This is a psychotropic drug that he started taking after the fire because he suffered from a rare disease, a delusional disorder that even doctors could not explain - "Cotard Syndrome".

Doctors say this is one of the rarest and most terrifying mental illnesses in the world, also known as the "disease of the living dead."

Patients will think that they are dead, and will suffer from very strong death hallucinations during the onset, such as body decay, blood stagnation, etc., and will also be accompanied by other symptoms.

Lei Yue did not go to get the medicine bottle, but lay straight on the bed, staring at the ceiling, listening to the wind and rain outside the window.

After eating it for so many years, I don’t want to eat it anymore.

Is it the disease of the living dead? But he is indeed dead. He died a long time ago. He died in the fire that year.

"Live well, mother-in-law." Lei Yue murmured, "Do you think everyone hates me, or do they just hate my face?"

No one wants to see you...your face...

The night rain outside was getting heavier and heavier, and the night wind made the windows bang. The glass windows that had been in disrepair for a long time were finally blown open, and rain poured in.

Suddenly, something flew through the storm. Lei Yue turned around and saw that it was a crow.

The crow is huge, with black feathers all over its body, its eyes are deep, its strong claws are grasping the crumbling window sill, and its long beak is raised in sharp curves.

He looked at the uninvited guest in silence, and the indescribable strange feeling he had had since the fire slightly emerged again.

If he doesn't take medicine, he will see what are medically called hallucinations. The more serious the condition, the more hallucinations he will see.

Every time, this crow always appears first, but there are others...

The cold wind blew the dark light in the corner of the bedroom, and Lei Yue suddenly saw that a tall weirdo wearing dirty rags suddenly sat on the wooden chair in the corner. The shadow shrouded the other person's face that could not be seen clearly

face.

But he could see that there were pieces of corroded flesh and blood hanging on the strange man's body, and rot and residue were constantly falling off, which was just like the miserable look he saw on his own body when he got sick.

Lei Yue's heart skipped a beat and he quickly looked away. The last thing he wanted to see when he got sick was this weirdo.

But he also saw a pair of classical flying goggles next to the many medicine bottles on the bedside table. The lenses were covered with a thick layer of dust, and the brown leather wrapped around the frame looked very stiff. The whole glasses seemed to be broken at any time.

Crow, weirdo, goggles...

They all showed up.

Lei Yue frowned and looked at the bottle of olanzapine again. After a while, he still didn't take it. He just closed his eyes, closed them tightly, and opened them again. At this time, the goggles were gone.

Close it tightly and open it again, and the weirdo is gone.

But no matter how many times he opened and closed it, the crow was always there.

The crow suddenly flapped its wings and flew away from the windswept window sill, landing on the unlit lamp on the bedside table with its eyes like a torch.

The weak nightlight illuminated its body, casting its shadow onto the floor where rain had splashed into it. The huge, elongated shadow looked like a statue in the dark.

Gradually, Lei Yue looked at it again.

The fire happened at night. When he was lying on a stretcher and being transported to the ambulance, while crying, he saw this crow flying from the distance of the night, covering the burning high-rise buildings, the waning moon and the street lights in black.

From then until now, this was the first time that I had observed it so carefully.

Lei Yue used to feel nervous and disgusted with it, thinking that it was seeking his family's bad luck, but now his eyes have gradually softened.

Crows, generally considered ominous and ugly black birds, are always feared and driven away by people...

"Everyone dislikes you." Lei Yue's face, which was both good and bad, suddenly grinned, "I just realized that we are so similar..."

He tried to clarify his messy thoughts, and after a while, he added: "Maybe, I still have you as a friend in this world."

Friend, this was the first time he called a crow this way, the first time he had such an accepting attitude toward it.

On the other side of the desk lamp, the crow didn't look at him, it just turned its dark eyes slightly, thinking about something unpredictable.

"Friend?" Lei Yue called it again, hoping that the crow would respond and break his loneliness.

But the crow remained silent, as if he didn't exist at all.

Lei Yue ignored it and muttered to himself about his confusion:

"Actually, I don't know if I can hold on, and I don't know how I will go next..."

He remembered some legends about crows, looked at the mysterious black bird, and laughed at himself:

"I heard that crows not only eat the carrion of the dead, but also know how to lead the dead on the road to resurrection. My friend, my mother-in-law asked me to live well, so what do you think I should do as a living dead? Can you guide me?

"

The broken glass windows were blown louder and louder by the strong wind, but the crow did not open its long beak and uttered a single word.

Over there, it seemed to have completed its inexplicable inspection of the surroundings, and suddenly it flapped its wings fiercely, took off from the desk lamp, and flew out the window.

"Hey, where are you going!" Lei Yue was startled, quickly stood up, ran to the window sill and looked outside.

At this time, there was a flash of lightning in the night sky outside, and a crow was seen running wildly through the bloody rainstorm, and all the raindrops were fluttered and splashed by it.

Lei Yue opened his eyes and looked around, the scars on his rotten face trembling slightly.

Why did it leave and not regard me as a friend? Could it be that even this ugly black bird dislikes me so much...

His mind was shaking violently like a rainstorm, but immediately, another thought emerged, and he grabbed hold of it:

"No, the crow is taking me somewhere. It is responding to me. It is leading the way. It is definitely the way I should take..."

But does this crow really exist? Maybe, and what does it matter?

Over the years, in order to reassure my mother-in-law, I accepted the identity of a patient, and the crow was just an illusion, and I honestly cooperated with the doctor and medicine to expel it.

But, now and in the future, it is no longer necessary.

Lei Yue thought about it until he smiled that smile that others said was scary, turned around and walked away with a long stride.

He left the house, went down the corridor, and walked on the dilapidated and wet road, letting the rain hit his face and wet his medium-short black hair.

The rain was freezing, the wind was biting, and the skin and flesh began to freeze.

Lei Yue felt that this was just right.

This night will be a new beginning. He will no longer let drugs cover up what he sees, nor will he let his hair cover up his ragged face.

In this way, the line of sight is not blocked, and the whole world becomes clearer in the eyes.

The trees on the roadside were blown by the strong wind and made a rustling sound, like the hoarse words of a damaged tape. Through the gaps between the ghostly branches and leaves, only the city lights were dim, and the neon halo became dim and dim in the heavier rainstorm.

green.

Lei Yue followed the crow in the sky alone, walking towards the darkness in the distance and towards the shadow-filled street.

The cold rain fell on his black windbreaker and disappeared in the stream of light.

Hello everyone, long time no see. Wow Li has gone through last year’s surgery, recovery and preparation. A newbie has set sail with a new book. Please save it and read it. It will be updated at 19:00 every night from tomorrow~~~
Chapter completed!